Rebuild Your Confidence and Your Future

Recovering from a toxic relationship can feel impossible, like you’ll never be yourself again. In a way, you never will. But this doesn’t have to be a bad thing! You have the opportunity to rebuild yourself better than you were before.

• Feel confident getting into your next relationship
• Feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings with women
• Set clear boundaries to protect yourself in your future relationships
• Know what you want from your next relationship

It’s so easy to give into the bitterness, or to give up on love. But here’s the thing:

• Not all women are “psychos.”
• It wasn’t all your fault.
• And there IS a way forward.

Step out of the shadow of your toxic relationship and into your full potential.

You want to move on, but your mind keeps spiraling

Talking about how we feel is hard at the best of times, but a toxic relationship is one of the hardest. You feel ashamed that you fell into a relationship with someone like that, yet at the same time you’re not really sure who’s to blame. You flip flop between blaming her, blaming yourself, and just feeling lost.

When you ask others for help, you only get these kinds of answers:

• Get over it.
• Since you’re a man, it’s all your fault.
• She was just a bitch and you’re better off without her.
• There is no right or wrong; it’s all a matter of perspective.
• They say it “just didn’t work out,” as if it was a normal relationship.
• They rhetorically ask “why didn’t you just leave…” insinuating that, because you didn’t leave, it mustn't have been bad.

None of these help you deal with your emotions, or understand what happened or who’s to blame. These answers offer no closure.

You’d think your friends and family would be there for you, but when you try to talk to them about it they…

• Wonder why you’re not over it yet.

• Call you a pussy for talking about it.

• Get uncomfortable and disengage with what you’re saying.

• Don’t show concern for what you’re going through.

• They only want the conversation to end.

You feel alone in your struggle because no one wants to hear how you really feel.

You spend all this time talking about your thoughts and feelings, yet it just leaves you feeling like there’s no answer, and that you’ll never be able to move on.

After weeks, months, maybe even years of trying to get answers, you’re only left with more questions and you feel even more confused, and like you’ll never be able to get over it. You’re left ruminating over endless “what ifs,” scared of dating other women, and drained from constant emotional uncertainty. All you want to do is move on, to let it all go, to get back to living your life, but you have no idea how.

Worst of all, you feel like a healthy relationship is impossible.

But the good news is — it IS possible. You can get back your confidence, your certainty, and your hope for a healthy relationship. Get the certainty you’re missing so you can say with confidence that you deserve better.

How You Feel Matters

Maybe you've tried ignoring how you feel, burying it and muscling through the pain. Many guys do. They say “fuck her” and drink their troubles away. I would know, this is what I did, too, for a while, and it doesn't work.

The problem with how most people approach recovering from toxic relationships (or any difficult emotional situation) is they either:

Most of your friends aren’t comfortable opening up about emotions. They get uncomfortable when you try to talk about how you feel. Meanwhile, the therapist you paid way too much for only gives you platitudes about how “we all have our own perspectives” and “there are no black and white situations” when it comes to relationships. This makes processing your emotions IMPOSSIBLE.

What you need is to feel your emotions and to process them productively. You have emotions for a reason and they're there to help you.

When you go through a toxic relationship, it's vital to feel the hurt. That doesn’t mean wallowing or ruminating over the same scenario again and again; it's not asking WHY she did something she did, trying to find explanations for her behavior.

You must accept the facts of the abuse in order to let it go.

To do this requires feeling the pain, not to wallow in it, but to learn from it. This means focusing on you and what you can control. You can’t control her or change the past. The value you can gain from your pain is through questions like these:

• Why did you put up with the abuse?
• Why didn't you leave?
• Why did you end up in that situation in the first place?
• What should I expect from a girlfriend?

These are HARD questions to face, but this is what it means to face the facts of the abuse. It means allowing yourself to look at these painful facts, feel them, digest them, and learn from them, which will allow you to move past them.

One of the hardest facts to accept is that you could have left at any point. To hear this feels like it was all your fault, that she’s not the one to blame, that the abuse wasn’t real. But this isn’t true. She can be a toxic abuser AND you could have left at any point. Both can be true. But until you’re able to say “I could have left” without adding a “but…” at the end of that sentence, you won’t be able to move past the abuse, and you’ll never be able to really learn how and why you fell into it to begin with.

Allowing yourself to feel that pain means allowing yourself to look at the painful facts about the relationship.

You can only learn your boundaries, what you want out of a relationship, and gain the confidence to be vulnerable with your future girlfriend, by facing those facts. Only then can you grow into a man who knows what he wants and has the confidence to go after it.

You've been taught that what you're feeling should either be buried or indulged in for its own sake, and that's what's keeping you where you're at. Stuck! Ruminating over your toxic ex.

Grow Stronger than You Were Before

In our culture, men are not taught to have boundaries in relationships.

We’re told that it’s our job to put up with anything, that we have no right to complain.

This leaves good men TOTALLY vulnerable to abusers. Big surprise that nearly half of all men (48.8%) in the United States experience psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime.

You don’t only need help processing how you feel, you need help gaining certainty that what she did was wrong, and the courage to never compromise on your self-respect and happiness again.

• Be able to see the initial mistake you made.
• See how much you've undervalued yourself.
• Learn how much you're ACTUALLY worth in a relationship.
• Be able to gauge a woman’s red flags, and see all the ways she’s showing you her toxicity.
• Learn how to dodge toxic women.
• How to wean yourself off craving that drama
• Know EXACTLY what kind of woman you want going forward.
• How to find and hold on to the kind of woman you want.
• How to keep your relationship fun and fresh in an ongoing way without the unhealthy "dopamine high" of toxic drama
• How to create a great relationship with a woman who actually cares for you.

Rather than being scared of slipping into another toxic relationship, you'll be confident asking women out because you'll know exactly how and why you fell into that toxic relationship to begin with. You’ll feel secure in your ability to protect yourself because you'll see past the superficial attractiveness and see the red flags you missed with your toxic ex.

You’ll grow from your abuse and you'll be free to choose a woman who will make you happy.

By this time next year, you could be:

• Confidently asking beautiful women out without fear of falling into another toxic relationship.
• Spending your time thinking about your passion project, rather than wondering if your toxic ex will ever text you back.
• Feeling energized and eager to live your life, rather than feeling drained and tired from constantly ruminating on what you “could have done better.”
• Feeling comfortable expressing yourself, rather than feeling afraid to talk about your feelings.
• Confidently standing by your boundaries because you know how devastating it is when you don’t.
• Feeling comfortable being vulnerable with your girlfriend, rather than being afraid of her next tantrum.
• Dating a woman who respects and admires you.

Your toxic ex isn’t worth spending more time ruminating over. Let’s get you back to living your life.

What people are saying:

I’ve Been Through What You’re Going Through Now

I’m Eric. As someone who’s been through a crippling toxic relationship, I know what it’s like to be there. You’re confused about what happened, your confidence is shattered, you feel like it was all your fault, and you're ashamed that you allowed this to happen to you.

I’ll help you grow from this painful experience, not just bury it.

I spent over a year in a relationship with a narcissist. I went through the whole gambit:

• Love bombing.
• Gaslighting.
• Blame-shifting.
• Projecting.
• Constant criticizing and insulting.
• Using recognition and affection as a means of manipulation.
• Weaponizing my vulnerability.

The relationship started out nice, in the “love bombing” phase. She found everything I said interesting. She spent all her free time with me. She never had anything bad to say about me or what I said. But that changed over time. She grew more distant, more argumentative, and more condescending; eventually, she became downright toxic. I didn’t notice it as it happened, but I fell into a deeply toxic relationship with a narcissist.

When I’d try to point out something positive in myself, she’d come up with the most intricate reasoning as to why I was worthless. She would often ridicule what I said, calling my points “stupid” and “ludicrous.”

One misstep and the whole day would be ruined. The worst part was — I didn’t know what a misstep was. I had no idea what would set her off. I was so nervous that I would end up making small mistakes, which, of course, made her angry.

I did tasks and chores for her to try and get her to see that I was valuable (it never worked, of course). When I did the dishes, because I was so nervous all the time, I broke probably 7 of her glasses. Each time it happened it would set her off. She’d be shouting at me that I was “so worthless that I couldn’t even wash dishes.” While she was screaming, I was damning myself. I hated the fact that I kept making mistakes, but I had no idea why I was. I lost track of what was and wasn’t true.

The only thing that existed was placating her capricious emotions.

During winter, I thought it would be nice to make her a fire. I made her a fire, with some dinner and wine, before she came home. When she got home, all she said was that she wanted to be alone that night. I sadly obliged her only to find out that she went on to cheat on me with a 67 year old man that night. She never apologized.

After a little over a year, she left me. At that point, I felt almost nothing. I was drained and empty inside. The only partial feelings I had left were vague confusion and an underlying sense of worthlessness, thinking that I had failed in this relationship.

I wanted to understand what happened to me and how to move on. I pored over every book I could find about emotional management, narcissistic abuse, and psychology. I taught myself to understand just how TOXIC my ex was. I learned how a narcissistic relationship sucks you in, how it destroys you from the inside out, and how to recover from it.

My system works — I’ve done it.

I’ll give you actionable plans on how you can start to rebuild your confidence and your life. Whether you’ve been through a toxic relationship or suspect you're in one now, I’m here to help you gain confidence in yourself, certainty in your choices, and a clear path to your next healthy relationship.

How It Works

We’ll start off with a $50 1 hour evaluation call to see if the fit is right. If we match and you want to move forward, we can talk about scheduling calls on either Google Meet or phone.

I’m flexible about when we schedule calls, as well as how many per day/week.

Gain the confidence to start living your best life

Toxic relationships don’t just cause emotional distress, they take away valuable time from your life. Not only is it the time you spent with them that’s gone, but all the time you spend thinking about it, expending precious energy ruminating over the same old questions, that’s time and energy you could be spending on furthering your life.

Your life is waiting for you, and one better than you had before your toxic girlfriend showed up. You’ll be far wiser than you were before. So why wait?